Peyton Funnies

Peyton is has been getting funnier and funnier.  Here are some of her quotes that have made us laugh from about age 2-2 1/2. 

• While singing I Am a Child of God, instead of saying, "has given me an earthly home" she says, "has given me a Berkley home."  
• When she's frustrated she yells, "I promise!" out of context.
• If I tell her not to do something she replies, "I do ever I want to do."
• "I can't poop.  My bum is too closed."
• I tapped Peyton's stuffed animal on the forehead and said, "This is Peyton's chicky."  Then tapped Peyton on the forehead and said, "This is Mommy's chicky."  She tapped her chicky and said, "No, this Peyton's chicky."  Then tapped her head and said, "This Peyton's forehead."
• When I had the hiccups she said, "Mom, you hicking up on me."  
• Her Grandpa Drew usually greets her by saying, "Hey Squirt!"  One day she said, "You no call me squirt anymore.  I Peyton."  
• While we were boating, my Dad was in the water.  We were circling around him in the boat so the girls couldn't see him behind us anymore.  My Mom asked, "Where's Grandpa?"  Peyton calmly responded, "He died." 
• Me: "Just push your poop out."  P: "I can't"  Me: "Why not?"  P: "It's too dangerous."
• While sitting in time out: "This is a joke!"
• She went down the waterslide at Bear Lake and Misty let her go all the way under the water at the end.  She came up, looked at Misty and said, "I'm proud of you."
• After her and Berkley had a raspberry fight in the kitchen: P: "You happy Mom?"  Me: "No, Im not happy."  P: "But you still love me." 
• She woke up from her nap crying and screaming.  I went in her room and she said, "That shoo-fly was bothering me."  (She always calls them shoo-flies.)
• When we went camping this summer there was a hole-in-the-ground "bathroom" that was one step up from a porta-potty.  We walked in for the first time and she said, "Mmmmm, it smells like watermelon in here."  
• We asked her if we should have another baby and she said, "No!  I da baby!"  
• Later, when my belly was a little bigger she touched it and said, "You have one big baby right here," then touched my chest and said, "and two little babies up here."
• "I have a strong beak to eat candy."  
• She was holding a cup of water at Grandma Lisa's house when Gimli (Rylee's dog) came running toward her.  She held up the water and said, "No, it's gluten!"  
• Berkley read the word "fox" and Peyton said, "Like fox elder bug!"
• I still have her sleeping in her crib.  When I get her out she jumps up to help me lift her.  One morning as she jumped up she yelled, "Rescue!"
• "I pooped big time!"
• Me (teasing): "You don't like ice cream."  P: "Yeah, and I don't like you either."
• "I hate this song!  I hate it, but I still love you." 
• P: "You washin the window?"
  Me: "Yeah I'm washing the blinds."
  P: "Oh. So they don't get cavities?"
• Me: "I need a blow dryer."
  P: "I have a fan. A big fan. You can dry your hair with it and somethin."

Soccer

Berkley played her first season of soccer this Spring.  Right off the bat she took the liberty of naming her team "team friendship."  Not only did she love it, she was surprisingly good at it.  She almost consistently came out with the ball and scored several goals a game.  It was really fun to watch her.

Her best friend Dani was on her team.  

 Dani's little sister Sami kept Peyton company.  

 Here's a goal I caught on video.

 She was still girly and sassy though. 

 I didn't quite catch the goal in this video but the prancing afterward is pretty great.

 Peyton did get bored and needed lots of snacks.

And the official team pic.

Berkley Funnies

Here are some quotes that made me chuckle.  Berkley was about 4-4 1/2 years old.

• B: "Mom, you should have named me Butterfly."  Me: "When you have kids you can name them whatever you want."  B: "Oh! I'll name my kids Butterfly, Daisy, Rose, Chocolate, Dance Class, and Olivia.  Chocolate and Dance Class are the boys."  
• "You are making me so sad!  I am going to flood this whole house with tears!"
• After I yelled: "That was so gross Mom!  You are making it so I can't feel the Holy Spirit!"  
• While she was jumping to Merrisa in the pool at Bear Lake she was mad because Merrisa wasn't close enough to the edge.  She told her to go away.  Merrisa asked, "Where should I go?"  Berkley replied, "Go back to Chile!" (Where Merrisa had just come home from her mission.)
• I was explaining to Berkley that she might have to wear uniforms when she goes to kindergarten such as khaki pants and collared shirts.  She replied, "Collars!?  Those are for dogs!"  
• When we were going to the beach in San Diego, Zack came out wearing a tank top with palm trees on it.  Berkley looked at him and said, "Dad, you look weird in that dress."
• A friend returned our bumbo baby seat I had loaned them so it was in our living room.  Berkley walked in and asked, "Why is that port-a-potty there?"
• She wanted to get past me while I was vacuuming but was too nervous.  B: "You're going to vacuum my foot!"  Me: "Yep." (continued vacuuming) B: "Then your favorite child will be sucked up in there and dumped in the garbage!"  Me: "My favorite child?"  B: (matter-of-factly) "Yeah."  
• We were eating at In N' Out burger.  She tapped my shoulder and leaned in to tell me a secret then whispered, "Hey Mom, some grown ups don't have any kids."  
• She saw a picture of an overly fake tan person and asked about it.  I explained that some people go to salons to have brown stuff sprayed on their skin.  She said, "I would never be one of those people... I would get purple."
• She ran full speed through Drew and Lisa's screen door.  It popped out onto their deck and she landed on top.  She looked up at everyone on the deck a little confused and said, "Excuse me."  
• She found some of Peyton's socks in her sock drawer.  I laughed and said something about how I always mix up their clothes.  She said, "It's okay, you're still a good mom."
• At her preschool she has 3 different teachers that they rotate through.  One for lesson, music, and art.  This year she has one teacher that's the same as last year and two new ones.  I didn't know which new one was which so I asked her.  She said, "Miss A has the shorter hair.  Miss B has the big bum."  
• While they were coloring one day she said to Peyton, "Gosh, you're really uncivilized."
• Sometimes she calls me "Your Highness" and means it.  
• "Look at my picnic Mom, I'm having fried people."

•  She'll say things like, "Peyton is small, me and Mom are medium, and Dad is big."  
• "I was sleepin so hard I didn't even want to wake up."  
• Performing a concert for her animals.

• Trying to say "hailing."

• "Dad! I'm going to pray to Heavenly Father and Heavenly Father will teach you how to be nice to cats!"  
• She found a turtleneck, put it on, and said, "Mom, it's like a scarf shirt!"  
• Berkley: "Mom, is today Sunday?"
  Me: "No, it's Saturday. Do you want it to be Sunday?"
  B: "Yeah."
  Me: "Why? Because you like to go to church?"
  B: "No. Because I want to wear a cute dress."
• "I'm exercising.  A woman has to do that every day."
• And just for fun, a video of her singing Royals last Thanksgiving (with a little help from Zack.)  That song came on a lot during our road trip to Arizona.  She was a couple months away from turning 4.  

Easter

We went to Drew and Lisa's the Sunday before Easter to dye eggs.  The girls had fun playing with Gimli and Webster, although they might still be a little scared of Gimli. 

 Berkley was in heaven dyeing her eggs. 

 Peyton probably preferred making the pizza (putting more toppings in her mouth than on her pizza.)

We went to the Clearfield city egg hunt the day before Easter. 

There were tons of eggs and the girls had a blast.  The candy was lame (tootsie rolls) but Peyton ended up with these sweet glasses. 

The Easter bunny was there too. 

Here's a video of Berkley during the hunt.  Our strategy was for her to run to the middle and get as many eggs as she could there.  I was laughing at how sporadic she was and how chaotic it was. 

Berkley made a book to leave for the Easter bunny. 

He loved the book, of course. 

So he left some good stuff in the girls' baskets. 

We took some pictures before church. 

I can't remember what Peyton was upset about but these pictures make me laugh. 

Also, check out that sweet beard. 

I wanted to get a picture with our tulips.  All 4 of them. 

We went over to the Woodbury's for Easter dinner and the girls got to hunt for eggs there too. 

And they got some classy bags to put their eggs in.